Monday, December 26, 2011
Should You Be Together Even If You Fight?
Some couples begin their relationship well. They go out a lot, laugh a lot, get intimate one time too many. But as months pass, they begin to argue at even the pettiest of things. While others would say arguing is just part of being a couple, dating experts believe otherwise. Having a major argument with the first year of the relationship can be a sign that the couple do not belong together.
“The first year of the relationship is usually when you’re the most flexible with each other,” wrote dating blogger Marius Panzarella. “Because the physical attraction is still high and you’re still getting to know each other, you should both be willing to make compromises for the other person.”
These compromises, he said, include eating food that you do not like or going out despite having to work the next day. Couples should be considerate of each other’s needs. Fighting with each other during the first year in the relationship, no matter what the reasons, is a sign that things would only get worse in time.
“The first year of the relationship is usually when you’re the most flexible with each other,” wrote dating blogger Marius Panzarella. “Because the physical attraction is still high and you’re still getting to know each other, you should both be willing to make compromises for the other person.”
These compromises, he said, include eating food that you do not like or going out despite having to work the next day. Couples should be considerate of each other’s needs. Fighting with each other during the first year in the relationship, no matter what the reasons, is a sign that things would only get worse in time.
Things You Need to Know Before Finding Love
Love and getting into a relationship is something that everyone thinks about at some point of their lives. Finding love and being with someone you wish to spend your life with is easier said than done. You should still have things to know before you go about finding love. This will help ensure that you can find the right relationship some day. Here are some of those things.
Know yourself first.
The problem with some people is that they try to get into a relationship not exactly sure what they want out of it. Just the fact that they are into one seems to be good enough for them. But this do not always lead to a successful relationship. You got to know yourself better first before you try to find love.
Getting to know yourself better means knowing what your own likes and dislikes are. This would mean what you try to look for in a relationship as well as the characteristics of a future partner that you think would fit in quite nicely. Having a good idea about yourself and what you want may provide you with better chances at finding a long lasting relationship in the future and a love that is for keeps.
Know the other person.
Finding love is not as simple as looking at one person and them sensing that it’s love. In the reality of things finding love at first sight does not necessarily work out well in the end. You need to get to know the other person first before you can decide if it is worth it.
Getting to know the other person takes time. This means that you might need to spend more time together first to get to know each other better. It may be easy to fall in love with another person that you have seen for the first time. But that perception may still change once you get to know the other person more.
It pays to take time first to learn about someone you feel would be a possible candidate for your love. Sure it may take some time and you would need to be a little more patient. But the time you spent knowing the other person better would be worth it if you are looking for a relationship that lasts.
Know yourself first.
The problem with some people is that they try to get into a relationship not exactly sure what they want out of it. Just the fact that they are into one seems to be good enough for them. But this do not always lead to a successful relationship. You got to know yourself better first before you try to find love.
Getting to know yourself better means knowing what your own likes and dislikes are. This would mean what you try to look for in a relationship as well as the characteristics of a future partner that you think would fit in quite nicely. Having a good idea about yourself and what you want may provide you with better chances at finding a long lasting relationship in the future and a love that is for keeps.
Know the other person.
Finding love is not as simple as looking at one person and them sensing that it’s love. In the reality of things finding love at first sight does not necessarily work out well in the end. You need to get to know the other person first before you can decide if it is worth it.
Getting to know the other person takes time. This means that you might need to spend more time together first to get to know each other better. It may be easy to fall in love with another person that you have seen for the first time. But that perception may still change once you get to know the other person more.
It pays to take time first to learn about someone you feel would be a possible candidate for your love. Sure it may take some time and you would need to be a little more patient. But the time you spent knowing the other person better would be worth it if you are looking for a relationship that lasts.
Text Message to Your Boyfriend or Girlfriend
Texting has become a social phenomenon to the point that it has affected many aspects of our lives, including our romantic relationships. Since it is a fairly new technology, social etiquette in texting are still being created and formed. With that in mind, what are the recommended text messages you should be sending to your romantic partner? Here are some helpful tips.
Sweet nothings – With our busy and hectic lives, people even have a hard time picking up the phone or even send an e-mail. However, a quick sweet message from your mobile phone like “Hope your having a great day” (whether in full or abbreviated into text speak) does wonders to your partner.
Send messages while far apart – If your romantic partner lives in a faraway city, or going to another place, sending a text message can create a surprising sense of connection between the two of you. Make your boyfriend or girlfriend feel that you are right there even if you are miles away.
Avoid guessing – If you find your partner’s message too cryptic or vague, wait until you are communicating face to face to your partner to ask what they were talking about. Some text messages may appear insincere or insensitive because these were delivered in a hurry, but your partner may actually mean different from what you are assuming. Respond the cryptic text with “I don’t get it. Let’s talk later.”
Avoid over-abbreviating text messages – Because text messages can only allow a limited number of characters, people could not help but abbreviated words and make them as short and simple as possible. Make sure to use symbols or terms that most people would understand or even send to their text messages. Avoid making up new texting terms on the dot because your partner might find it too cryptic.
Never text angry – If you and your partner are not in good terms, it is best to resolve your emotions through personal, face-to-face communication. Avoid venting out your anger on your partner through texting, which some people may consider as a sign of insensitivity.
Never deliver a bad news – If you are going to break up with your partner, sending a text message may appear comfortable because you are “avoiding the drama,” but in reality is that it shows your cowardice into the situation.
Sweet nothings – With our busy and hectic lives, people even have a hard time picking up the phone or even send an e-mail. However, a quick sweet message from your mobile phone like “Hope your having a great day” (whether in full or abbreviated into text speak) does wonders to your partner.
Send messages while far apart – If your romantic partner lives in a faraway city, or going to another place, sending a text message can create a surprising sense of connection between the two of you. Make your boyfriend or girlfriend feel that you are right there even if you are miles away.
Avoid guessing – If you find your partner’s message too cryptic or vague, wait until you are communicating face to face to your partner to ask what they were talking about. Some text messages may appear insincere or insensitive because these were delivered in a hurry, but your partner may actually mean different from what you are assuming. Respond the cryptic text with “I don’t get it. Let’s talk later.”
Avoid over-abbreviating text messages – Because text messages can only allow a limited number of characters, people could not help but abbreviated words and make them as short and simple as possible. Make sure to use symbols or terms that most people would understand or even send to their text messages. Avoid making up new texting terms on the dot because your partner might find it too cryptic.
Never text angry – If you and your partner are not in good terms, it is best to resolve your emotions through personal, face-to-face communication. Avoid venting out your anger on your partner through texting, which some people may consider as a sign of insensitivity.
Never deliver a bad news – If you are going to break up with your partner, sending a text message may appear comfortable because you are “avoiding the drama,” but in reality is that it shows your cowardice into the situation.
Social Media Makes Cheating In A Relationship Easier
With online social networks and social media in general becoming a popular reason why many people head on to the Web on a daily basis, it would surely have quite an influence on our daily lives. It may also affect not only individuals but their relationships as well. And surprisingly, there are now a lot of women who think that social media in general may make it easy for cheating in a relationship.
An increasing number of women think that social media makes it easier for men to cheat. In this day and age where “sexting” and sending pics of private parts via Twitter seems to have become popular, it is no wonder why eight out of ten women would think so. It is the convenience, ease, quickness and reach of how social media gets messages across that has become bane for some couples in a relationship. But on the other hand, women also think that social media had made it easier for couples to catch their cheating partners.
In line with infidelity issues, it seems that more and more single women find cyberflirting more as a relationship no-no than married women. A poll showed that married women seem to be more forgiving of such online activities than single women. About 52 percent of married women find sexting with other women forgivable as to just 30 percent of single women. In the case of cyberflirting, doing it with an ex seem forgivable to 64 percent of married women whereas only 49 percent of single women find the act forgivable when their men do ti with their exes.
Truly, social media may have also created something that people find troubling when it comes to relationships. The fact that social interaction online always seems to be open 24/7 makes it some sort of a threat for some relationships in terms of a cheating risk. But in this age of online connectivity, it seems that trust, faithfulness to a partner as well as honesty just became even more valuable traits between people in a relationship.
An increasing number of women think that social media makes it easier for men to cheat. In this day and age where “sexting” and sending pics of private parts via Twitter seems to have become popular, it is no wonder why eight out of ten women would think so. It is the convenience, ease, quickness and reach of how social media gets messages across that has become bane for some couples in a relationship. But on the other hand, women also think that social media had made it easier for couples to catch their cheating partners.
In line with infidelity issues, it seems that more and more single women find cyberflirting more as a relationship no-no than married women. A poll showed that married women seem to be more forgiving of such online activities than single women. About 52 percent of married women find sexting with other women forgivable as to just 30 percent of single women. In the case of cyberflirting, doing it with an ex seem forgivable to 64 percent of married women whereas only 49 percent of single women find the act forgivable when their men do ti with their exes.
Truly, social media may have also created something that people find troubling when it comes to relationships. The fact that social interaction online always seems to be open 24/7 makes it some sort of a threat for some relationships in terms of a cheating risk. But in this age of online connectivity, it seems that trust, faithfulness to a partner as well as honesty just became even more valuable traits between people in a relationship.
Tech Dating Mistakes To Avoid
Technology and dating seems to be two different things. But in today’s world, both will usually see themselves going together, especially in a relationship between two tech savvy individuals. While technology can be used to help improve the dating experience, certain mistakes can also help ruin it. Here are some of the most common tech dating mistakes to avoid.
Calling Or Texting During Dates
It has become a quite common occurrence nowadays- people seemingly preoccupied making calls or texting even when on a date. It can make one seem disinterested and bored. This can easily hurt the feelings of your date. Try to avoid making calls or texting as much as possible during a dinner date.
Dumping Someone On Twitter Or Facebook
Just because it seems quite convenient, but trying to dump someone on Twitter or Facebook is just wrong. It lacks of respect for the other party. Not only that, by dumping someone online, you get to publicize everything which can be a cause of embarrassment. Mount up enough courage to do it face to face when you wish to dump someone.
Posting Dating Specifics On A Blog
While it may seem harmless trying to relay dating experiences on a personal blog, it may not be always the right thing to do. Your date may not want you to broadcast everything online. It is better to be safe by avoiding trying to post what happened during your date on your blog.
Not Calling A Date
While texting may seem quite enough to share one’s thoughts with a date while apart, it simply is not enough. You may need to call someone you are serious with and not just greet him or her via text. Voice communication is still important in any relationship. Relying only on text messages can make it seem impersonal to a fault.
Calling Or Texting During Dates
It has become a quite common occurrence nowadays- people seemingly preoccupied making calls or texting even when on a date. It can make one seem disinterested and bored. This can easily hurt the feelings of your date. Try to avoid making calls or texting as much as possible during a dinner date.
Dumping Someone On Twitter Or Facebook
Just because it seems quite convenient, but trying to dump someone on Twitter or Facebook is just wrong. It lacks of respect for the other party. Not only that, by dumping someone online, you get to publicize everything which can be a cause of embarrassment. Mount up enough courage to do it face to face when you wish to dump someone.
Posting Dating Specifics On A Blog
While it may seem harmless trying to relay dating experiences on a personal blog, it may not be always the right thing to do. Your date may not want you to broadcast everything online. It is better to be safe by avoiding trying to post what happened during your date on your blog.
Not Calling A Date
While texting may seem quite enough to share one’s thoughts with a date while apart, it simply is not enough. You may need to call someone you are serious with and not just greet him or her via text. Voice communication is still important in any relationship. Relying only on text messages can make it seem impersonal to a fault.
Being a geek no longer seems to be a bad thing these days. After all, those tech savvy geeks seem to have the most money in terms of earning capacity. What’s more, there are now some people who would want to look for single geeks to get to know better and maybe get into a relationship with them. But first, people would need to find where they are. Here are just some of the places to find them.
Online World
If ever geeks have their own world, it is on the Web. That’s probably the easiest place to look for them. After all, even geeks try to find love online. And there are quite a number of places where the single geeks meet up. Aside from the forums, chat rooms and the like, there are also geeks looking for love in sites like Cupidtino for the Apple geeks and DateCraft for geeks into Warcraft and similar games.
Comic Conventions
If you are going for comic geeks, you may want to explore their world to get to know them. You can usually find them in comic conventions where the comic geeks usually frequent, with costume and all. You might want to get into the fray and dress up to your favorite comic book character to become one with them.
Silicon Valley
If you prefer professional geeks, you might be able to find them in Silicon Valley, specifically in Sunnyvale, California. The center of all things technology in the US would surely also be home to many geeks. The geeks you may find here are the working type, those who usually develop those innovative devices and software that becomes consumer fare.
Online World
If ever geeks have their own world, it is on the Web. That’s probably the easiest place to look for them. After all, even geeks try to find love online. And there are quite a number of places where the single geeks meet up. Aside from the forums, chat rooms and the like, there are also geeks looking for love in sites like Cupidtino for the Apple geeks and DateCraft for geeks into Warcraft and similar games.
Comic Conventions
If you are going for comic geeks, you may want to explore their world to get to know them. You can usually find them in comic conventions where the comic geeks usually frequent, with costume and all. You might want to get into the fray and dress up to your favorite comic book character to become one with them.
Silicon Valley
If you prefer professional geeks, you might be able to find them in Silicon Valley, specifically in Sunnyvale, California. The center of all things technology in the US would surely also be home to many geeks. The geeks you may find here are the working type, those who usually develop those innovative devices and software that becomes consumer fare.
Dating Tips for the Unemployed
One of the challenges in relationships is keeping your dating life romantic, but if you are unemployed in this harsh financial times, the burden seems to feel much heavier. Leading relationship expert Brandon Wade says that the unemployed should not wallow in self-pity and instead use this down time as an opportunity to drastically change your love life.
Be a “sugar baby” – If you have good looks, make it work for you. Try registering in free dating sites that connects sugar daddies to ladies looking for rich men, or join fellow singles who sell their first dates on auction. These niche online dating sites enable you to find generous and wealthy people who are willing to pay you for a date. It is also a good opportunity to network with executives of Fortune 1000 companies and establish rapport with them for potential employment.
Improve yourself - It is important to remain in a positive attitude even when unemployed. If you are out of shape, find time to create a workout schedule and stick to it. If you are unhealthy, switch to eating healthy. Occupy your time with improving your self and turning the old you into a more attractive you.
Be a “sugar baby” – If you have good looks, make it work for you. Try registering in free dating sites that connects sugar daddies to ladies looking for rich men, or join fellow singles who sell their first dates on auction. These niche online dating sites enable you to find generous and wealthy people who are willing to pay you for a date. It is also a good opportunity to network with executives of Fortune 1000 companies and establish rapport with them for potential employment.
Improve yourself - It is important to remain in a positive attitude even when unemployed. If you are out of shape, find time to create a workout schedule and stick to it. If you are unhealthy, switch to eating healthy. Occupy your time with improving your self and turning the old you into a more attractive you.
Dating With Your Brain
Do you know that your brain can also affect your love life? Dr. Jason Shepherd, a neurophysicist in the Department of Brain and Cognitive Sciences at M.I.T., provides some helpful dating tips in a scientific perspective. Note that his views do not necessarily reflect those of the institute.
Be aware that you are clueless – According to Dr. Shepherd, many of our most important decisions are made unconsciously. We receive so many sensory inputs, but our conscious experience captures only a small percentage of this information. It is natural for chemistry and attraction occur without us really knowing, which is why we often end up wondering why we are drawn to certain people.
Be appealing to women by being intelligent – The brains of men and women are wired differently. While men are generally attracted to what they see, women choose their partners in a “cerebral” manner. This makes men who are not so lucky in the looks department end up dating the most beautiful girl in the crowd by being funny and smart.
Learn from “feedback loops” – Everything you do is noted by the brain with the help of its “feedback loops,” which can be located everywhere in this vital organ. Doing something that activates a reward system, such as going on a good date, provides molecular changes in the reward system that reinforces that good experience. In a neurophysiologist’s perspective, “love” is the end result of positive reinforcement of these reward circuits. However, just because you know what goes on in your brain that causes you to fall in love, does not mean you are not falling in love.
Know your dealbreakers – Before going on a date, be sure you know what turns you off. Clearly state on your dating profile your likes and what you cannot tolerate. It may turn off many potential daters, but you surely get quality responses.
Respect is key – Although chemistry and attraction is needed among couples, the relationship will not work without respecting each other’s intellect, drive, etc. Even if the sparks do not fly and there is no prospect for a second date, how you respect your date can be remembered.
Be aware that you are clueless – According to Dr. Shepherd, many of our most important decisions are made unconsciously. We receive so many sensory inputs, but our conscious experience captures only a small percentage of this information. It is natural for chemistry and attraction occur without us really knowing, which is why we often end up wondering why we are drawn to certain people.
Be appealing to women by being intelligent – The brains of men and women are wired differently. While men are generally attracted to what they see, women choose their partners in a “cerebral” manner. This makes men who are not so lucky in the looks department end up dating the most beautiful girl in the crowd by being funny and smart.
Learn from “feedback loops” – Everything you do is noted by the brain with the help of its “feedback loops,” which can be located everywhere in this vital organ. Doing something that activates a reward system, such as going on a good date, provides molecular changes in the reward system that reinforces that good experience. In a neurophysiologist’s perspective, “love” is the end result of positive reinforcement of these reward circuits. However, just because you know what goes on in your brain that causes you to fall in love, does not mean you are not falling in love.
Know your dealbreakers – Before going on a date, be sure you know what turns you off. Clearly state on your dating profile your likes and what you cannot tolerate. It may turn off many potential daters, but you surely get quality responses.
Respect is key – Although chemistry and attraction is needed among couples, the relationship will not work without respecting each other’s intellect, drive, etc. Even if the sparks do not fly and there is no prospect for a second date, how you respect your date can be remembered.
Speed dating
Speed dating is a formalized matchmaking process or dating system whose purpose is to encourage people to meet a large number of new people. Its origins are credited to Rabbi Yaacov Deyo of Aish HaTorah, originally as a way to help Jewish singles meet and marry."SpeedDating", as a single word, is a registered trademark of Aish HaTorah."Speed dating", as two separate words, is often used as a generic term for similar events.
The first speed-dating event took place at Peet’s Café in Beverly Hills in late 1998. Soon afterward, several commercial services began offering secular round-robin dating events across the United States. By 2000, speed dating had really taken off, perhaps boosted by its portrayal in shows such as Sex and the City as something that glamorous people did. Supporters argue that speed dating saves time, as most people quickly decide if they are romantically compatible, and first impressions are often permanent
The first speed-dating event took place at Peet’s Café in Beverly Hills in late 1998. Soon afterward, several commercial services began offering secular round-robin dating events across the United States. By 2000, speed dating had really taken off, perhaps boosted by its portrayal in shows such as Sex and the City as something that glamorous people did. Supporters argue that speed dating saves time, as most people quickly decide if they are romantically compatible, and first impressions are often permanent
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